Which Winona Are You?
thought out by marianah at 7:45 AM
Don't stray
Don't ever go away
I should be much too smart for this
You know it gets the better
Of me
Sometimes
When you and I collide
I fall into an ocean of you
Pull me out in time
Don't let me drown
Let me down
I say it's all because of you
And here I
Go
Losing my
Control
I'm practising your name
So I can say it
To your face it doesn't
Seem right
To look you in the eye
And let all the things
You mean to me
Come tumbling out my mouth
Indeed it's time
Tell you why
I say it's
Infinitely true
Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
And there's no cure
And no way to be sure
Why everythings turned inside out
Instilling so much doubt
It makes me so tired
I feel so uninspired
My head is battling with my heart
My logic has been torn apart
And now
It all turns sour
Come sweeten
Every afternoon
Say you'll stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
Say you'll Stay
Don't come and go
Like you do
Sway my way
Yeah I need to know
All about you
Its all because of you
Its all because of you
Now it all turns sour
Come sweeten
Every afternoon
It's time
Tell you why
I say it's
Infinitely true
Say you'll stay
This is such a beautiful song. Its like anyone who has ever been in love would have felt this way. Thanks to Bic Runga for it...it's almost like an athem to me.
thought out by marianah at 11:26 AM
Which My Little Pony Are You?
thought out by marianah at 9:23 PM
I found an old notebook of my rambles this morning.
It was funny, but the funniest was the stickman flipbook-like cartoon Jamal drew in it about this superman-like character. That should be more or less a year ago. I could remember it clearly. We were on the 9th floor planning the costume party, and I was listing down the invites. It was just a lazy day, with plenty of smokes- and -bumming- around -cigarrettes from others. Jamal went through my little book, and he was reading through and making fun of it. After a while of unproductive planning, he grabbed a pen and drew what he drew in my little book.
I miss him. He should be somewhere on training grounds, waking up at 5 in the morning, and eating sucky food. Just hope he's over the "Thsyahh" - syndrome. That bitch. Making use of him.
Ok, gotta go plan my day.
"Hello again, my sunshine in rain. I hope you're well, I've missed you so...Say goodnight, my blueberry light, and dream of, me... I want you near, at least a weekend a year" - The WannaDies
thought out by marianah at 9:13 PM
I met my angel Fuzzy yesterday.
We realised how different our conversations have become. It wasn’t a bad thing or anything like that. It was more of the change of issues, and the area of discussions have shifted as well.
A couple of smokes. A few good laughs. A bit of bitching. I’m so easy to please sometimes. J
Might be on recce again later. Will be meeting Sandra back at the office to discuss locations… sigh, I’m so unmotivated.
I got emails from my boy-wonder Hafez and Ravin ‘Spears’ telling me they’ll be there for my birthday. I miss those bandits.
Guess I’m off to work now. Will be back soon
thought out by marianah at 7:37 PM
I was with the girls today.
It was terrific.
It was fabulous I love the word. Fabulous.
It was scorching hot and I could feel myself burning. Even my feet felt as if it was fire. But it was worth every minute of it.
Audrey brought the 4 of us to the abandoned Henderson Secondary School, and showed us a run down shed we might wanna check out for location use. We proceeded to the back where the railway track was.
We were told the train will pass at 3 pm, and we were joking around about being run down flat by it. We walked on the tracks, and it was one of the nicest walks for me. It felt we were somewhere else. We were laughing our way through the whole passage and took the coolest pictures.
I’m starting to love them so.
I can’t wait for my birthday. It’s not about presents or money, or feeling special or older, but the fact that I’m gonna see my truest friends there. The emobandits, my ’malam jiwa retak’ gang…. It’s fabulous. :P
Goodnight
fab·u·lous
Pronunciation: 'fa-by&-l&s
Function: adjective
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin fabulosus, from fabula
Date: 15th century
1 a : resembling or suggesting a fable : of an incredible, astonishing, or exaggerated natureb : WONDERFUL, MARVELOUS
thought out by marianah at 8:21 AM
Work sucks today
Well, not only today actually. Peculiarly everyone had something to carp about. Especially the latest pay cuts and production budget ‘constraints’. Sigh.
I’m not in the best frame of mind today. The usual ‘crowd’ today was funny though; they lifted my spirits up a little. Anggie was being her usual chatty self, constantly in her exuberant high spirits. Sandra kept pestering me to sing her a verse from ‘Why’ over and over, and Audrey was just being Audrey. I feel out of harm's way with them… :P
Imran and me had a long long talk last night. Somehow I felt terrible after it… I couldn’t precisely pin down why I felt that way. In some way, I felt we’re both so unlike, and I would be lying if I say that I didn’t feel a little hurt after last night. It’s the kind of tiny, slight hurt that bothers you… like a paper cut. It’s something I’m struggling to stop thinking about. I still love the boy, no doubt, but I just feel unsettled.
Anyway, I’m seeing him later. Maybe things will be different. Maybe things will change.
Maybe.
I just wished that we would both remember how much we wanted each other. How much love there was, -the thrills and anxiety... I wished for so many things to happen and not to happen.
I’ll be here later.
“How many times do I have to try to tell you
that I’m sorry for the things I’ve done?
…..that’s why it hurts so bad to hear the
words that keeps on falling from your mouth?
Tell me…Why?” - Annie Lennox
thought out by marianah at 1:52 AM
REALITY BITES
It's a good Sunday.
Not fantastic, but good.
I slept till noon. Sleeep..oh, sweet sweet luxury now. I even had time to do my own facial, scrubbed my feet, shaved. It felt really good.
I met Imran late afternoon. Somehow, my day perks up a little with him around, even when we're not talking. It's just his presence I guess, -his smell, the way he does his hair, his laid-back style that is almost..slipshod.
But I love this boy anyway, I really do.
I love the conversations we had. I love the fact we don't spend impulsively. We are more or less sticking to our " 5 bucks, a cup of coffee, a cigarrette, and a good conversation" guiding principle that was ripped off from Reality Bites.
Anyway, an ex-boyfriend buzzed me a couple of days back...the weirdest thing was we haven't talked for almost 2 years, and to have him asking me 'what am I up to these days' and telling me 'do keep in touch' was even more bizzare. But who cares? I don't even feel a pinch anymore when I hear a Beatles' tune or see someone with similar sideburns.
Because like everybody else and the world itself, I moved on. It was awfully painful and heartwrenching, but I fucking did step ahead.
And now I have the boy who means the world to me...who smiles genuinely...who is sincere to me.
It's been a good Sunday.
from Reality Bites:
Troy:: See Lainy, this is all we need. A couple of smokes, a cup of coffee, and a little bit of conversation. You and me and five bucks.
Lelaina:: You got it!
Michael: Have I stepped over some line in the sands of coolness with you, because excuse me if somebody doesn't know the secret handshake with you.
Troy: There's no secret handshake. There's an IQ prerequisite, but there's no secret handshake.
Lelaina: Well, congratulations, Troy Dyer. Welcome to the world of the emotionally mature. It's a very nice place to visit. Hey, you might run in to Michael he lives here.
Troy: Oh yeah, Michael Michael. He's so mature because he lets you navigate that entire relationship. Well, I'm sorry Lelaina, but you can't navigate me. I might do mean things and hurt you and I might run away without your permission and you might hate me forever and I know that scares the shit out of you because I'm the only real thing that you have.
Lelaina: Yeah, well that ain't real much.
thought out by marianah at 8:32 AM
