Jimi left for Sydney on Monday.
It's almost a week now.
I miss having time. I miss saying, "I have time for...".
As each day passes me by, I'm starting to be aware of my detachment from at least one thing that I care about. And it always boils down to one thing: People.
Jimi was a new friend. New, -but a friend still nevertheless. Maybe it's because you know he listens. And even though his remarks might be dripping with sacarsm sometimes, he still listens. Or maybe the pain he's going through is all just too recognizable to me. In a way, Jimi was a subsitute for all my 'detachments', and now that he's gone, it made me realised that the things that I pine for are all that really ever mattered.
I pine for people I care about. I pine for conversations. I pine for laughter. I pine for a few crying get-togethers. And none of them have anything to do with money. And money is what I gave my 'detachments' up for. For the first time, I dared myself to say 'I hate money", because at this very moment, I really do.
And to the people I pine for: Fuz, Nash, Hanie, Hafez, Farah, Hida, Kelvin, Ravin, Jamal, Shahreil, Charlie, Peishan -I long to see ya all.
And to Jimi: wherever you are, just please know that I thank you.
"If I could sleep through the cold nights, if I could breathe and eat right....maybe I wouldn't feel so humble. Oh you, it's always you." -Sophie Z.
thought out by marianah at 8:46 PM
I'm starting this for reality checks... I need them desperately.
"Jai guru de va ohm. Nothing's gonna change my world. Nothing's gonna change my world"
I'm just in denial.
thought out by marianah at 8:51 AM